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Re: Pep For Poets
All critiques have been done, sorry for the delay! Let me know if you want any more, I'll try to be quicker next time. xD
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: untitled poem
As I walk past, by the stair, Those two eyes follow me everywhere. I am not intimidated by that dirty stare. No, I am not and I don't care. I ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: A goodbye.
This is alright. It does seem in a lot of places that you were trying to rhyme just for the sake of rhyming, and while it's great when a poem ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: Storm (revised)
I love how you made the city sound like a baby! Hehe, that's a nice, original concept, and I quite enjoyed it. It's so hard to critique something after so ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: Moonlight Dances In The Water
Sorry for the delay in this crit! You've had so many in-depth critiques already, I hope I can still be somewhat helpful. I really like your poem. It is lovely ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: Who would've guessed?
Hello! Sorry for the delay in this critique. I think I'll look at this line by line: If this wretched obsession wasn't beating in my chest, I like this first ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: Belated Ode To Charred Love
This only has one critique? This saddens me. I really enjoyed reading this, and sorry I haven't gotten around to critiquing it sooner. A couple of things, the third stanza ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: [currently untitled]
Sorry this is so late, I know you posted in my review thread ages ago and I've been neglecting my critiquing a lot lately, but here we go! Firstly, I ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: The Single Greatest Threat To Civilization
Hooray for South Park references! :D
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: Hey?
If you want to change your avatar, hover over My YWS at the top of any page, then click on My Avatar/Photo, scroll down the page a bit and it'll ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: Are you writing a novel right now?
Yes! It's based on something I wrote for one of the Writing Olympic events, the painting one. If I get loads done, maybe November will become NaNoEmo for me (National ...
Aug 31, 2008 -
Re: Despair.
This would flow better if all the lines were roughly the same length. Also, as I've said in one of your previous poems, you use simple, obvious rhymes, again - ...
Aug 30, 2008 -
Re: All she wanted to do was sing
Well, wow. At first, I didn't like this girl because she sounded so pretty and perfect. But then, how you changed it around...you described it extremely well, the way you ...
Aug 30, 2008 -
Re: In love with you.
It's quite cute, but the rhyming is a little obvious - eye, sky, cry, die, me, be, free, etc. You touch on some good ideas, but you touch them...and then ...
Aug 30, 2008 -
Re: Tired of LOL?
I have another: Haha! ...What, not new-agey enough? xD
Aug 30, 2008
